As can be expected, things can get rather untidy from time to time in the bosom of Abraham. It's not that I am an untidy person. Quite the contrary. I am resolutely fastidious in every pure and cleanly detail. It's just that my mind is often turned to more weighty things, so it doesn't hurt to call in a maid service every once in a while.So imagine my surprise this morning when I was serviced by none other than the one and only Fanny Alger. Yep, this is really her -- resurrected in the prime of her youth and glory, just as she was promised. She even baked a quiche. Sort of helps you understand the whole polygamy thing now, doesn't it.
So Steven, does everyone get to wear PJ's in Heaven or are you just a bad ass that refuses to wear the white robes? Just curious.
ReplyDeleteDear Brother Woozer,
ReplyDeleteA few things by way of comment:
1. First of all, a abhor short cuts and the people who make them. They are lazy and the fastest path to the evil one. My name is spelled with a "ph" - not a "v." And while I appreciate that you used the full name "Stephen" as opposed to the more vulgar short cut "Steve" which so many rowdy ex-Elders do these days to try and get a laugh, you did still take a shortcut - perhaps unintentionally -- with the "ph" sound. But the devil cares little about intentions -- mistakes are mistakes -- so care and attention to detail is of the utmost importance, especially when dealing with something as important as names. Because as we learn from the great prophet Michael D Tannehill, it is by names that we are saved -- so watch it (Mormon Expression podcast episode 61).
2. There must have been a glitch in my peepingstone, because the words came out a little blurry. It looks like you asked if I am a bad sport for wearing PJ's. The picture you are referring to was taken of me during my earthly mortal probation while serving on my mission actually. You can't really see it, but the other missionaries in the apartment thought it would be hilarious to put baby powder on my side burns to make my hair look grey, and they called this my stake president pose. I was not amused at the time, nor am I amused now. But rest assured that I do not wear these PJ's in my translated state, nor could I, because in fact...
3. It is a little known fact that resurrected and semi-resurrected beings are resurrected with their white robes sealed and grafted to their eternal bodies. We can't take them off at all, which yields some wonderful blessings (no shopping, no competitive trends in fashion, no laundry, etc) and poses a few problems (see earlier post on "pissmakers"). I am pretty sure this is different for those in the highest degree of the Celestial Kingdom -- I am hoping so, at least -- I will let you know when I get there.
Thank you for your inquiries,
Yours in eternal humble righteousness,
Elder Steven Erastus Knudsen III